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Finding Sara. Why I believe true personal change can only occur from within.

First and foremost let me reassure you Sara is ok.  She is not lost nor has harm befallen upon her.  Sara is someone who exists but has never been given the opportunity to be.  Sara is me.  Well part of me.  And like many other aspects, abilities or strengths within my being, it is a part of me that has never really seen the light of day.  It is an undeveloped, untapped personal potential.

Why does Sara matter? For starters it is a name that was given to me upon birth.  It is my first name although the world, myself included, knows and identifies the person I am and the person I represent by the name Carolina.  My name was one of many things or coordinates decided for not chosen by me.  The place of my birth, my religion, my language, my socio-economical start in life, my DNA, my nationality were given to me and formed my very first understanding of my place in the world.  Now when you think about it, these are huge aspects of ourselves that by the very nature of life are not our choice.  More important than these -if possible- is our environment (nature vs nurture), the people around us, our early teachers.  Again not chosen by us yet having all the power in the world to shape our very understanding of who we are and in most cases who we are going to be, where we are going to live, and so forth…

If you were fortunate enough to have good messages, teachers and environment you are very lucky. When I say “good”, trust me you were fortunate. If these were “great” you are one of the very few truly blessed; but at some point in the maturity process you begin to be your own voice, your own teacher.  You begin to build your own environment and begin to make your own choices.  The place, language, career, station in life, religion, the place where you now live is your choice. By the way doing nothing to change where you started or your given lot in life is also a choice.  And as time goes by some of these choices, some of the aspects of your life both personal and professional that you have allowed, either by action or inaction may not be representing you well or allowing you to be the best version of yourself, to live the best life or to have the greatest legacy or contribution in life to yourself or to those who are meaningful to you.

The need for personal change speaks to you. Sometimes it whispers, sometimes it shouts and sometimes shakes you to your very core.  If external, it is easier to identify, a politically unstable environment, socio-economical reasons, or outright survival will force you to take charge. For this kind of change once it takes place and you remove yourself from that situation, say left a place where food was scarce, once you manage to find a new place to live where food or safety are not ongoing dangers, your mind and your behavior will most likely eventually adapt to your new surroundings once trust is established that what threatened your existence is no longer there.

Internal change is different If you are not taking care of areas in your life that you should, be it your mental (stress, job satisfaction, toxic relationships, etc.) or your physical (diet, exercise, toxic environments, addictions etc. ) your body, mind and spirit will tell you.  It does require for you to stop and listen.  You can chose to ignore it and watch yourself decay and be a lesser person than you can be, each day being worse than the day before to the point of numbness or victimhood. Or you can do something about it.

Back to Sara. Once you arrive at the crossroads of change whether by being proactive –taking charge of your life  — or by being reactive and realize that if you do not change you will perish, the ability to change is within you.  Like Sara there are many aspects, skills or abilities within myself that have never been called upon that can be your greatest resource.  True change requires transformation, and transformation is becoming something new.  I believe it means reaching, searching, taking inventory of what tools you have within you to enable you to be the person you want to be, to have the job you wish to have, to earn the income you wish to earn.  In the process of taking inventory, you will notice you may not have all the skills you need. The great news is they can all be acquired, they can all be developed.  Decide where you want to go, the kind of person you want to be, the kind of relationships you wish to have, most importantly, find out what kind of person it takes, then build a road map.  Build a plan, work the plan, find the tools, develop the skills, work the plan, believe you can do it, understand why you want to do it, have a compelling reason why it must be done, then work the plan.  Yes, work the plan is there three times, and it needs to be there many more.  Work the plan, trust the plan.  Be flexible, but never lose sight of why and what you wish to achieve.

One of Sara’s favorite quotes (yes she has now been called from the bench and is ready to play) is Albert Einstein’s “We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.” Change your thinking, reach within, and you can change any aspect of yourself or your life you wish to change. All you need to make it happen you already have within.

Carolina Billings

Carolina Billings

Carolina M. Billings is an executive with 15+ year’s leadership experience in the fields of Business Development, Human Resources and Finance. As CFO-CHRO of a multi-million business conglomerate, she performs a truly interdisciplinary role within a portfolio of diverse industries ranging from Supply Chain, Logistics & Distribution, Wealth Management, Furniture Import, Sales & Distribution as well as Interior Design. She champions leadership initiatives as well as empowering and coaching/mentoring others to lead. Developing a hybrid of Finance and Human Resources has enable her to become leading business partner. Her great ability to influence and engage others in the pursuit of goals and objectives makes her a true innovator and change agent. Carolina is currently pursuing her Masters in Interdisciplinary studies with Royal Roads University, She holds Graduate Certificates from Cornell University and Queen’s University in the fields of Change Management and Leadership. She is a Co-Active Professional coach currently doing her practicum towards Certification with ICF. She holds a CHRL designation and a High Honor’s HRM Graduate Certificate. Carolina is the founder of Big Fish Coaching a private practice specializing in personal leadership, career coaching, conflict resolutions and life change management.
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1 Comment » for Finding Sara. Why I believe true personal change can only occur from within.
  1. bills8091 says:

    I think you are right that change can only come from within. My religion is a big part of who I am and has helped me change what I needed to change. I like to think we are all trying to change for the best.

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