Dear Kelly,

I was planning to ask my girlfriend to marry me this Valentine’s Day.

We’ve been together for over a year now, and I wanted this to be something special.

I am worried that I may not be able to be home for Valentine’s Day.

I asked for it off, but I work for a small company and if I don’t work, a truck sits.

They are really trying to get loads worked around the day for me.

If I am not home, what can I do?

– Wanna marry my gal

Dear Wanna marry my gal,

Congratulations! I have three ideas for you.

The first is: Can you take her with you on a run in the truck? Does your company allow it? Is she able to go along? This is not always possible, but spending some time on the road together could be a lot of fun!

While on the road, stop somewhere, legally of course, with a nice view and ask her.

It would be something neither of you would ever forget, and also a place in the country that will always have a special meaning for you.

The second idea may be to reschedule Valentine’s Day for a day when you will be home. This is something you can, and may have to do for many holidays and special occasions to come.

Do sweet little things on the actual day, such as leave trinkets, notes, chocolates and other things around the house for her to find.

Let her know where she can find these items when you phone her.

The third idea would be to do it on Valentine’s Day anyway. This idea would require some planning. Do you have a video camera?

Take a video of yourself asking her to marry you. You may have the tape and the ring wrapped up in a gift box.

Call her up while you are on the road, ask her to put the video tape in and while you are both on the phone, she can watch the tape. She can open the gift once she’s viewed the video.

Whatever method you choose, be creative, romantic, you should know your girlfriend and what she would like the most. Happy wishes for a wonderful engagement and a fabulous wedding!

– Kelly

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Dear Kelly,

My husband has been driving for almost three years now. When he first went out on the road, it was to pay off some bills and get a down payment for our house, we figured about two years.

We paid off the bills and bought our first house with in the two years that we planned.

Then the house we bought needed a few things done to it, so he stayed on the road.

We’ve been doing well, I have an okay income and he makes nice paychecks.

If he came off the road and got a local job here in town, we would live a nice life.

He doesn’t want to come off the road now; he says that he needs to keep making this money so that we have a back up savings. We want to have children and I want him working here to raise our family. This was a deal we made, why is he making this so hard for me? We’ve been married six years and it’s time to settle down.

– Want him home again

Dear Want him home again,

Once they get out there on the road, if they don’t hate it, they most probably love it!

It can be very hard for someone to give up the freedom of the road.

They may not even understand why they don’t want to leave it. That’s why all the practical reasons for staying on the road seem to be so important.

You’ll need to sit down and talk with him and be very practical about it.

This is a subject that comes up a lot.

Many times, people go on the road for a “little while” to try and pay off debts or earn some extra money for the kitty, then turn around and love it out there.

Reassure him that coming home to work will be okay. Maybe if sees a budget on paper, he will understand better that you will be financially stable.

Perhaps be open to set a new deadline. Another six months, maybe a year to save up some money in a saving account then come off the road and start a family.

Be very honest with him and remind him of the reasons why he went out there, that you have reached those goals and more, and that it’s time to come home as promised.

I wish you all the best talking to him.

– Kelly

– Kelly Livingstone is the editor of ATruckersWife.com, a Web site dedicated to truckers’ wives and what’s important to them. You can e-mail her at column@atruckerswife.com. Or you can send your questions and comments via snail mail to: Letters, Truck News, 12 Concorde Place, Suite 800, Toronto, Ont. M3C 4J2.