My boyfriend is a new trucker and I am worried as I have been hearing all about these ladies of the evening that hang around at the truck stops. He has been gone for four weeks and will still be gone for another four to six weeks. I am worried because we have been apart for six months and now he is out and who knows what is happening?
Too long gone?
Dear Too long gone,
This is a common worry. One thing that you need to be sure of is that you have a solid relationship. Talk often, if you don’t have cell phones or maintain regular phone calls; do that as soon as you can.
Keeping in touch and letting each other know that you are missed will keep your hearts with each other.
Tell him how you feel and that you need a little reassurance from him. Worrying can play all kinds of games with your mind, and it isn’t worth it.
Exercise; this can help for both of you. It is a good way to get out pent up energy. Hit the gym, go for a bike ride or get out and walk. For your trucker, he can be inventive in how he gets his exercise.
Push ups, sit ups, lots of stretching and maybe even walking around the truck. Visit your doctor and ask for exercise ideas for both of you. Getting fit and keeping yourselves in tune with each other will do wonders for your time together!
Yes, it is hard with our truckers away from us so long, but infidelity can be found in every walk of life. Build your relationship on a strong foundation of trust and respect and that home time will be even more special!
My husband has been driving solo for the last six years. He just started driving with a partner about a month ago. He was really worried that he would hate it, and we discussed it for quite awhile before he took the plunge.
He was afraid that he wouldn’t get along with his partner, that he would be a bad driver, he’d be lazy or a bunch of other concerns. I reassured him that if it didn’t work out, he could always go back to solo. Who knows, he might just hook up with a great partner.
Well, he loves this guy! They work great together, he’s happier on the weekends when he comes home, he’s not tired anymore and we’ve even invited his partner and his wife over for a barbecue when the weather warms up.
Sounds great doesn’t it? I miss him all week so much because I cannot call him as much as I could before! I am afraid that either he is sleeping, or his partner is sleeping.
When he does call when they are stopped, the calls are short since they keep moving all the time as a team.
When he drove solo, we would talk for an hour when he would stop for the night.
I know this is so selfish, and I want to be as excited as he is. This has been a wonderful change for him. And I should be happy too! Help!
– Just wanna talk to hubby
Dear Just wanna talk to hubby,
I cannot remember the last call I had with my husband that lasted more than 10 minutes, and that includes him talking to all three children!
When they drive team, it’s quite a challenge to get personal phone time. Try mentioning this to your husband next weekend.
Ask him if there is some time during the day where you could get some personal one-on-one time with him on the phone.
He will know when it is possible.
His body is adjusting to a completely different way of driving right now.
It isn’t easy to change your whole time clock in the blink of an eye.
Bunk time is usually shorter, and more often, when they drive team, so getting to sleep is very important.
If your husband has a cell phone, when they stop to unload or load, perhaps he could get out of the truck and talk to you there. A short call when he hits the bunk in a low quiet voice may be a good thing.
Spend a few minutes whispering sweet nothings to each other; let him know that you can hardly wait until he pulls in this weekend.
I know that it’s hard to give some things up, but just think of the better weekends you will have when he’s home and not so tired.
– I encourage you to send in your questions and comments. I will try to answer as many questions as I can here. Feel free to send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org or snail mail at: Dear Kelly, PO Box 183 Stn. F, Winnipeg, MB, R2L 1M0.